Hotter than Hell: Ryan Seacrest

I guess today is the day of the blondies.

 

My love for Ryan Seacrest is inexplicable.  He's blonde (sometimes), which isn't usually my thing.  He's cheesy beyond belief (okay, sometimes I am down with the cheese - I'll admit).  He has huge teeth.  Yet, I love him so very much.

 

I can wax on and on about my love for him.  Here are just a few of the things I have said in the past:

I need to say that my Ryan love quadrupled last night when he teared up after Jasmine's elimination. He just held her all close and whispered to her about how she was going to be okay and that he loved her and her poise and intelligence and overall awesomeness. Oh my God. I would have lost it if he said some crap like that to me. As it was, I was crying heaving sobs on my couch and I didn't even like Jasmine all that much. This is just further proof that this man is made of rainbows, glitter and some combination of feather boas and bearskin rugs. In Ryan's World, life is all flowers and sausages. Come ... go with me to that place.

 

He is just the best human being on the planet, pretty much. I have no idea if he's actually a good person, but if he isn't, he deserves an effing Oscar every year for the next twenty years.

 

He is a sweetiekins! I want to bring him hot chocolate and snickerdoodles! He is the wind beneath my wings.

 

I want Ryan to come sit on a table in front of me and ask me inane questions.

 

Baby Ryan had buck teeth! Lovement! He did well with the teefuses as he grew. I wonder if he had braces or if those are porcelain veneers or whatever.

 

I just want Ryan to know that, after the shenanigans of last week when the show ran over and I missed TiVoing ADAM, I was very angry with him for about five minutes.  But all is forgiven because he is my Elf of Delight - I cannot stay mad at him for long.  I mean, look at this face:

 

How can you not love him?

Comments

[Tonyette]

Ryan is pretty cute and cheesy!! Your love of him is understandable...and amusing, I must admit! I love that he is your "Elf of Delight"! Ha!

[Marie]

Flowers & sausages??? LMFAO !!!!! I love ya ladybug!!!! You gotta consider doing stand-up comedy in the future!

[Toya]

LOL! I can't take credit for that one, Marie. I think it was a little boy on "Wife Swap" who used that first - I just borrowed it from him because it is about the funniest thing I've ever heard.

And I don't think stand-up would be my thing, unless I was kind of a Kathy Griffin style comic. I wouldn't want to do the joke/punchline thing, but telling a funny story would be great!

[Patti]

He is a beautiful specimen.

[Toya]

Hi Patti! Glad to see you agree with me!

[gina]

Sorry, Toya. can't concur on this one. Now had you said Simon Baker....yes, yes, and yes again. Seacrest is a bit too velveetian for me.

[Toya]

Heh. Well, Gina, we can't agree on 'em all, can we? (BTW - Simon's on the list.)

[Erica]

RYAN SEACREST IS SOOO HOT. I agree with you on every single word you said.

[Toya]

Yay, Erica! Another Seacrest lover!